Building strong relationships with students is one of the most important parts of creating a positive classroom. When students know that you care about them and trust your intentions, they are more likely to participate, ask for help, and respond positively to correction.
These practical strategies can help you connect with students at the beginning of the school year, and continue strengthening those relationships all year long.
In this post, you’ll learn how to:
- Share appropriate personal stories
- Use humor to connect with students
- Build trust by following through
- Listen and learn about students
- Create classroom conversations
- Make individual students feel noticed
- Remain flexible when students need support
During my more than 25 years as an educator and math tutor, I have worked with many different types of students and classroom personalities.
Over the years, I’ve learned that meaningful connections are built through small, consistent actions. The following strategies have helped me earn students’ trust and create a classroom where they feel known, valued, and comfortable participating.
Building Connections
Talk about yourself
Share stories about your family, pets, hobbies, and funny classroom experiences.
Use Humor in the Classroom
They can be silly jokes, one-liners, puns, or knock knock jokes. It doesn’t matter what age either. At this time I teach high school ESL students and one of my favorite jokes is “What did Tigger see when he looked into the toilet?” Answer: Pooh. Now most American students would understand this joke since they have probably heard of Winnie the Pooh. And I have also come to realize that non-American students may or may not have also heard of Winnie the Pooh. So with a little bit of explanation from either myself for a fellow native speaker, the smile may come on or their eyes will roll. Either way you have made a small connection with your students.
Build Trust by Following Through
Building trust takes time. Students need to see that you keep your promises. If you cannot do something you said you would do, be honest and explain why.
Listen to Your Students
If a student walks up to your desk wanting to tell you something, give them your undivided attention. If you are busy, ask them to please wait and give them an idea of how long so they aren’t just standing there wondering when you will be done.
Learn From Your Students
Students have a lot to offer. Ask them questions about their day or their interests. Then later on in the school year you will have a conversation starter and be able to learn even more from them.
Apologize When Necessary
One day, I mistakenly thought a student had taken a candy prize from my desk. I told the class that stealing would damage the trust between us and that we would no longer be able to have games or prizes. Then I turned around and saw the candy exactly where I had left it.
I immediately admitted my mistake and apologized to the class. I told them how relieved I was that no one had taken it, and then we moved forward. That moment reminded my students that I was willing to take responsibility when I was wrong. None of us is perfect, but an honest apology can help build trust.
Hold Beginning-of-Class Discussions
Use the beginning of class as either a classroom discussion, have a student spend one minute talking about what they did over the weekend, or walk around the room while the students are talking to each other and personally engage with them.
Use Activities That Create Conversations
Activities that encourage conversation can also help students connect with one another. In my growth mindset activities, students solve problems and use their answers to reveal an encouraging quote about learning, effort, or perseverance. The completed quote can then be used to begin a class discussion about handling mistakes and overcoming challenges.
Collaborative activities, such as the 100 Number Challenge, give students an easy way to talk, problem-solve, and begin forming classroom connections.
Attend Extracurricular Activities
When a student asks you to come to their band concert, sports event, karate presentation, or art show try to go. Some students may not have the support at home and you might be the very one they are depending on. Additionally when you go to these outside events, you will have chance to meet parents and other family members.
Make Time for Individual Students
Be available and consistent so they know they can depend on you. Hold office hours before or after school for this reason. If you are willing to give up your lunch period and have students hang out in your room this is another way to connect with them.
Be Flexible
Pay attention to what your students need and be willing to adjust your plans when necessary. Whenever possible, make changes that benefit them. Then, when you must make a change they may not like, they will be more likely to trust that you have a good reason.
Are you ready to make strong, lasting relationships?
Strong student relationships aren’t created through one big gesture. They grow through small, consistent actions: listening, following through, apologizing when necessary, and showing students that they matter.
Which of these strategies will you try first? Leave a comment and share your favorite way to connect with students.
